Average Grod's Average Blog

I played Stubbs the Zombie this week. Man I was disappointed. The worst part is that the game had sooooo much potential. I think it still has what is probably the best soundtrack ever. Some how this also increases its disappointment factor.

Let me start with the soundtrack. It is a compilation of popular oldies performed by modern rock bands. I know this has the potential to be cheesy but once you see the songs and the artists you realize there is no way this album could go wrong. If this had nothing to do with a game it would be cool. Songs you know and love such as 'Lolipop,' 'Earth Angel,' 'Mr. Sandman,'and 'My Boyfriends Back.' These are performed by artists such as Deathcab for Cutie, Dandy Warhols, Flaming Lips, and Phantom Planet. The game itself was made by Wideload Games. It is their first game but that doesn't mean their employees are new to games by any means. These are the guys that made Halo. BAH! This is hurting already. This game had too much potential. I haven't even got to the zombies yet! Adding zombies to anything automatically ups its cool factor. Think about it. Football is cool. Just about everyone here is into it. What if a zombie came out of the playfield, ripped off a quarterbacks arm and beat him with it before walking the ball to the endzone for a touchdown. How bout Harry Potter movies. Just increase the ratings to R and add zombies. Instant classic. Holidays? No problem! Halloween with real live dead zombies would be crazy cool and who better to carve the turkey on the real holidays than a zombie butler? As you can plainly see there is no way this game could have been bad. Some how it is.

Zombies are freaking cool. But it is not fun to play as one. Stubbs moves like a zombie. This attention to detail is cool at first. He limps and moves slow like the real guys. But after about 10 seconds I was wishing I could run. Who wants to limp around in a platform game? Story? We don't need no stinkin story! Then you shall have none my son. Lets see... we have a nice town, nice people, ADD ZOMBIES! I know I said that adding zombies is cool. It is. This game has zombies but has absolutely NO STORY. There is no reason you are there. Nothing is explained. I didn't actually play the game all the way through so this may happen at some point but I quit well after I should have and there was no hint of a story. The soundtrack. I know I raved about this earlier. So how can I be so upset with it now? Where is it??? I felt like I fell victim to a bate and switch. The title page has songs from the soundtrack playing but that is it. And they aren't in random order so if you want to hear a specific song you have to wait for it. I didn't hear any of this cool music in the game. The game uses the Halo 2 engine. This is a double bladed sword. The game runs smoothly and looks good. On the other hand it has the same crappy load times as Halo 2 and worse, it feels like you are playing a bad version of Halo 2. You have no gun and you move too slow to really approach enemies. Your moves are very limited and get repetitive quickly. The vehicles don't fit the story at all, wait there is no story, so they really detract from the game because it is never explained how a zombie comes to drive a slime projecting jeep cannon thing around a giant green house. To make matters even worse the vehicle just feels like you are driving a halo vehicle with a bad skin. In fact the entire game feels like a bad Halo mod which is really sad. If you are going to use another games engine you are obligated to make a better game since you don't actually have to build a game from the ground up. This game could have and should have been my pick of the year. Instead it brings me to tears.
If you are looking for a game in this style then play Destroy All Humans. It is short and isn't without its flaws but it is entertaining enough to be worth the price of a rental. Psychonauts easily wins as my game of the year. PLEASE go buy it, rent it, steal it and play it. Actually don't steal it. I need these guys to be around to make more games so give them some money.